Costco Just Told Hoarders What They Can Do With All Their Excess Toilet Paper
For days and days it looked like Black Friday at Costco. Or, as the Instagram account “CostcoBuys” put it, “Panic at the Costco.”
Customers lined up around stores to buy things they most certainly did not want to run out of in the case they’d be under quarantine for days on end.
They looked in vain for toilet paper:
Where’s the toilet paper!!— sonja (@sonjamh66) March 22, 2020
Hubby and I @ Costco.. NO LUCK😳🤬😤😡 pic.twitter.com/FA4Vm4x9Bp
And the rolled gold was increasing in value in the eyes of the hoarders. As a joke, this toilet paper roll was put in the fine jewelry section of Costco with a $200 price tag.
And then the day came and Costco was finally stocked with a “crap-ton of toilet paper,” as noted by Twitter user JD Fitzgerald.
Moreover, it was stocked with hand sanitizer, Lysol, paper towels, and other essentials such as rice and water.
And people piled it up. Twitter user “Movieman Steve” used the hashtag “ThatsNotNormalToMe” and proclaimed, “Costco people standing in line just to buy toilet paper and water but nothing else.”
You’ll need a bigger cart for all that stuff. And just like that, someone “created” one.
Mocking toilet paper hoarders was encouraged by the likes of Twitter user Jeannie Warner, who said, “Let us all keep up the mockery and ridicule of toilet paper hoarders.”
Behold those amazing toilet paper wigs worn by “post coronavirus males displaying their hunter-gatherer prowess in order to attract mates.”
Silver linings in meme form. Let us all keep up the mockery and ridicule of toilet paper hoarders. pic.twitter.com/bwXip7s5co— Jeannie Warner (@thetsmorgan) March 23, 2020
It actually got a little creepy. “Propagandopolis” noted that it reminded him of the scolds who went after hoarders during WWII using posters like this that said, “Hoarder — shame on you!”
“Hoarder - shame on you!” – 🇩🇪 German poster from the Second World War (1942) discouraging the hoarding of goods. pic.twitter.com/PNnUvgpY2P— Propagandopolis (@propagandopolis) March 22, 2020
People publicly mocked others. This person, “Methy Anne,” noted that not only the back of this pick up was loaded with toilet paper but it was also driven by a Trump supporter. Someone with the name “Methy” probably should stay in her lane. Just a thought.
But now Costco has made an announcement. All of the toilet paper, paper towels, hand sanitizer, wipes, Lysol, water bottles, and rice hoarded by people by the cart and truck full will not be taken back. Signs in the store read (in all caps), “RETURNS WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED ON TOILET PAPER, PAPER TOWELS, SANITIZING WIPES, WATER, RICE, LYSOL.”
And there was great rejoicing and mocking in the land. “lmao Costco basically saying y’all wanted to be extra, y’all gonna deal with your millions of toilet paper all over your house.”
“Xyth Lord” said, “Enjoy your lifetime supply of toilet paper and wipes you crazy #hoarders! #Costco is not taking any more returns. Better start figuring out what you are gonna do with 10 bags of rice you bought!”
Enjoy your lifetime supply of toilet paper and wipes you crazy #hoarders! #Costco is not taking any more returns. Better start figuring out what you are gonna do with 10 bags of rice you bought! pic.twitter.com/z2U7tN7ru3— Xyth Lord (@Xyth_Lord) March 19, 2020
We know a lot of the hoarders will be trying to sell on eBay. But I checked, and you’ve got lots of competition. Good luck.